Friday, and A Bit of Ski Sunday, Chamonix

Zagan the motorhome’s favourite quote of the day: “They gave us a motorhome in Canada, but we couldn’t put water in it in case it froze, so we used the shower to store beer instead.” Yup, Ju spotted Ed Leigh and Graham Bell, Ski Sunday presenters extraordinaire, and popped over for a quick chat, as you do. As per their TV persona’s, they were top fellas, posing for a photo and telling us they’d had their wrap-up party for this year’s show last night, so were a bit worse for wear.

Ju with Ed Leigh and Graham Bell at Les Houches, site of tomorrow’s Kandahar, Men’s World Cup 2016 Downhill finale

Winding it back a bit to this morning, we’re still in our freebie parking spot alongside the road leading from Chamonix to the Swiss border (N45.92827, E6.87674). Despite having hoofed it down with snow last night, the road was kept open by ploughs through the night, and at this time of year is mad busy. I estimate I got 2, maybe 3 minutes of sleep. Waking (after minute #3) and pulling a blind down this morning, I was entertained by the site of cars driving at speed on sheet ice, in the main without incident.

About a cm of ice remained on the road until mid morning

A Spanish-registered motorhome a few spaces from us had a bad morning though. Pulling out, inexplicably without actually clearing a great deal of his cab windows, he’d not spotted the fact a black car was pretty much alongside him. Said black car had no choice but to slide across the road, crashing front-on into a minibus carrying ski-goers. “What the f**k are you doing!?” shouted the lass driving the car, not without cause it seemed. No-one was hurt, but as we found when I smashed a wing mirror in France some time back, it took about 2 hours to complete the paperwork. The motorhome was unscathed, but the car and minibus were taken away on a flatbed, a bit mangled.

Anyway, back to this here parking spot. It has a peculiar set of properties. On the one hand, it is dire. Adjacent to a busy road and trainline, with cars, ploughs and whatever running all night. I worry about us being rammed by someone with similar ice-driving skills to me (there are many, many Brits here). On the other hand, it has the most magnificent view of the ridges of rock running up to the Mont Blanc massif to the East. Vertical curtains of rock, interlaced with cracked, shining glaciers, topped off with razor-edged spikes.  It’s a neck-craning. pure-awesome wonder, see:

It is also free of charge, when the car park next door is requesting sixteen and a half of your finest Euro-beer-tokens per 24 hours. It also has direct access to a wooded landscape behind us, covered with more powder than an ageing drag queen. Oh, and it’s a 5 minute stagger from the centre of one of the World’s foremost winter adrenelin sports centres. Sweet.

Not the quietest of kipping spots in Chamonix, but pretty cracking nevertheless

How much snow last night? About a dog’s shoulder

This morning’s dog walk, yeah man

The Arve river running south towards Chamonix centre

With Charlie well and truly walked, we climbed aboard the ski bus to Les Houches, about a 30 min ride down the valley. The Kandahar is on tomorrow, the name coming via a join-the-dots route from an army chap who once marched to the savoir of a besieged force in Kandahar, Afghanistan, and later on became another kind of force in Alpine skiing. Today was a warm-up event, a combined slalom (this morning) and downhill (this afternoon). I’m not big into skiing, but the buzz was infectious as the music was blasted out, flags were waved, the odd cowbell rung and commentators egged us all on.

We scrabbled our way up the slope to the finish line, up packed snow turning to sheet ice

Later on the race start was delayed after someone had a ‘minor’ accident at the same spot we’d decided was too dangerous for us fools, requiring the helicopter to come in

Guess who’s sponsoring the event? Fire up the Quattro!

Great viewing spot wangled. We had to leave early though, as the start was delayed 75 mins and we had Charlie to come check on

What does this guy have on his CV?

Pisten Bully! We love these machines, they’re all driven by wizened old fellas half-hammered on pastis, allegedly

The trip home was characterised by the world famous ‘bus push’. A phrase coined by Ju to capture the movement of ski-carrying folks attempting to fit onto a bus which is already full. Even leaving early, the bus push was in full effect. One English chap loudly berated the snorting, charging wildebeest as we all hoofed our way onto the bus “I say, there are people trying to get off you know”. Charming stuff, a small culture clash in full evidence, only the English queue.

Right, minus 12 tonight chaps. Tally ho! And yes, we did tell Ed and Graham we have hot water, a non-beer shower and central heating. Wusses that we are.

Ju on solar-panel clearing duty. We shifted maybe 4 or 5 inches of the stuff over a couple of sessions, and were rewarded with a few amp-hours of leccy for the heating.

Cheers folks! Jay